bekaboo

Dear God,
It's me, your wacky child. So, You know I've been working on this portfolio for this nomination for t-o-y. You know it's got me really frustrated. Lord, I know people think I'm all that braggy stuff- it's embarrassing sometimes, but You know me better than anyone else, and I know me, know my day in & day out, my failings (many they are!), my strengths and weaknesses... I so don't feel worthy of winning something like this. And I so don't know how to write what needs to be written for this portfolio.

And then, I feel a bundle of emotions too, because though I don't really feel like I should win such an award, I won't lie and say it wouldn't be a really neat thing to actually win county, or especially state t-o-y. I can't even begin to imagine that! I don't see how it could happen; I'm sure I'm not enough of the kind of teacher that could would that. I'm just me, a teacher who really loves her kids and families and tries to show that in everything I do. I try to see the best in each child, no matter how badly they behave. When I teach my kids, I imagine it's You that's teaching. When I hug my kids, pat them on the head or shoulder, smile at them from across the room, cafe, sidewalk... when I show them the "I love you" sign language sign and they show it back, well all those times I feel like it's You doing it and it's just my hand or face or arms. But, sure, I'd really like to win that. It would probably boost my self-esteem, but then again, You probably know whether it would make me conceited too. ??? I don't know.

So, anyway, will You help me with this portfolio? Will You give me the words I should say? Will You help me to represent You as I write this and when it goes to whomever it goes to? Will You let the people who read my portfolio see You in it? That's what I really want, no matter what. And help me to keep my eyes on You and nothing else.

Thanks God! I'm more appreciative of all You do for me, more than I can say. I hope You can see it inside me- where I hope it really counts...

Rebekah :)