Robert's Church

Last night we attended Robert's church. He attends the Vietnamese Baptist Church in Greensboro. He started going to youth group there on Friday nights (in addition to our own church services) with some friends from school last January after he went to a skating night at the "Icehouse" with their group. He instantly felt right at home with the youth group, and liked it even better than the youth group at church where we had been attending since we moved here. He has since commented on the church people-he said they had been so warm and welcoming to him that they were like family to him. He really loves that church!!! He started thinking about and mentioning a few times that he just really wanted to go to church there as "his" church (they were much friendlier and loved the youth more than he felt at the other church, and he LOVED the youth group a lot more). We told him we would pray about it, and we did. We asked the youth leader to come by and let us meet him sometime, which he did. We had a nice conversation with him, and were very pleased. Anyway when we began to look for a new church in April, Robert again asked us to "let him go" to his church. So, in May, we decided he could, and he's been attending there ever since. He goes faithfully, pays his tithes, and is actively involved in the youth group. I can tell that he is growing in God as he comes home and shares what the pastor preached about, I can see him reading his Bible and sharing with me things he's learned, he pays his tithes and more and gives to missions too, he is becoming less "tight" with his money and more generous with God and with others. He shares a lot about the pastor's mission trips to Vietnam, and I know he's called his grandma to ask her to pray about those trips as well.

So, last night, they had their Christmas service/program. Robert was going to be singing, so we thought this would be the perfect time to visit, which we've been wanting to do for a long, long time. Boy, was that a new experience!!! Matthew goes to youth group on Fridays with Robert and has for a while now too, but Barbara, Rob, & I had not been there yet. They were very, very warm and friendly people! The pastor's wife had a handshake of iron, took us by the hand told us "Merry Christmas" and took us right up to the front row. For anyone who knows me, after years of marriage to Rob who is a bit of a recluse in social activities, a ton (literally) of weight gain, and a lot of "bad" experiences, I am strictly a back row church attender. I always sit on the back row, and if I have to move up more than one row, I feel EXTREMELY uncomfortable!!! So this was doubly bad, to be on the front row, to be in front of all these people who are short and thin and tiny. We were the only "white" people there, and we didn't understand a word that was being said in the whole building. I was planning on sitting in the back where we could quietly watch and participate without being noticed. Not happening!!! The man who began the service was, I think, welcoming visitors to the church. Different people, and their children, would stand up and the church clapped for them, then the man at the microphone would talk some more, someone else would stand up and more applause. The next thing I know, he's looking at us and saying something and pausing and then he gestured for us to stand up. Everyone clapped, and I got caught up in the headphones that weren't working anyway and yanked them off my head. I felt like such an idiot!!!!!!! :) Then the pastor's wife came up and told me that they were for when "pastor preach." Now I really felt dumb. :) I just knew Robert would be embarrassed by me.

There ended up being no translation that night for some reason, but it was very neat to watch him preach and to hear a sermon in another language. I could catch a few words- Luke, Joseph, Mary, Jesus, & Bethlehem. That was all I understood, but as I watched the pastor preach, I thought about heaven. I know there will probably be some heavenly language, but I thought it would be neat if we all spoke our own languages and could still understand each other. However God has that worked out, I think it will be so neat to see all the people of all races, colors, cultures, there together loving God and worshipping together. There won't be any prejudices, any superiority, any stuck-up people. We'll all be brothers and sisters serving God together. I wish it could be that way on earth now.

Just another aside- As a teacher of students from far away places like Pakistan, Mexico, Puerto Rico, and Vietnam, I found it an interesting and educational experience too. It reminds me and gave me a first-hand experience to see what it might feel like for my kids and their families to be surrounded by people who look different, eat different foods, and speak a different language. It helped me understand, even more through first hand experience, how it might feel for them on a daily basis to be so "different" from everyone else around them.

After church, the people all went to the gym for food, one lady invited us over to join them. Matthew was out with a coworker of mine and her family for a birthday dinner for her son, Spencer, so we were going to get on home to make sure we were there when he got back- that also happened to be a good and legitimate "excuse" for us- Barbara was very uptight about having to eat Vietnamese food, and I was afraid we might really embarrass Robert. But, Barbara wanted to meet the youth leaders (she's been talking about going with them on Friday nights now that she's not working). So, Robert took us over to the gym just so she could meet the leaders- Dai & Jenny & Bao. As we were coming in the door, here came the pastor's wife. She grabbed hold of us by the arms and pulled us into the food line telling us that she had forgotten to invite us over for food, to "come, come eat." She kept waving us into the line and was very persistent. I was afraid we would be offensive if we didn't stay, so we stayed. Barbara was very nervous, and to be honest, so was I. Robert has told us about some of the foods that he has eaten at church (They eat together a couple times a month after church on Sundays, and the youth eat together every Sunday). Rob doesn't care for ginger either, and that is used heavily in Vietnamese food I think. So, we were all three very brave and tried some new things. I was very proud of Barbara, who is a vegetarian and also picky. She tried some small bites of several things I my plate after I fished out and ate the meat for her. The people around us were very friendly and we talked to a couple as much as our language barriers allowed us to. We sat with Robert and some of his friends from the youth group and school. He does fit right in there, and I can see why he likes it. We did the right thing by allowing him to attend there. We also heard that "Robert is a good boy." (from the pastor's wife who came up and grabbed Rob by the arm to tell him that and reached up and patted Robert's cheek. She said, "He is good boy, he sing in Vietnamese." She told us several times that he was a good boy, and it made me feel very proud.

And yes, Robert did sing in Vietnamese. It was very neat and moving to see him up there with his friends and youth leaders singing in another language. I sat there beaming at him, and thinking of all the years since Rob and I decided we wanted to get married- from our engagement to our marriage to our years of being young parents of young children, to the toddlers and babies that crawled and ran through our apartment, to preschoolers swinging on the swing set and sliding down the slide, to the "movie nights" we used to have together where we all slept in the living room together, to learning to teach a kid to ride a bike, to all the ear infections, surgeries, hospital trips, to the arguing siblings, to all the good times and wonderful memories, to every stage we've been through... I know there are a lot of things I could have done better, and there a few things I wish I could "redo," but as I watched him, I thought, "With God's help we did good. We have raised a son who loves God, wants to go to church and serve Him, who is not prejudiced at all and doesn't see skin color or eye shape or hair color or language as a barrier between people, just as another wondrous way God made us." That was what I set out to do when I said I wanted to be a mom- to bring up kids that would love and live for God and who would not go into the world and cause hurt but would love everyone no matter the outward appearance. Yeah, I could find things I should have done better, but in the end, Rob and I have "done good." Not perfect, but pretty good.